Ask lots of questions, want to know how things work. Play with new developments. Enjoy everything as children do. Have a good time almost anywhere. Wonder about things, experiment, make mistakes, get hurt, and laugh. Ask: “What is different now? What if I did this? Who can answer my questions? What is funny about this?”

Rapidly assimilate new or unexpected experiences and facilitate being changed by them. Ask “What is the lesson here? What early clues did I ignore? The next time that happens I will….” Make notes to yourself. Write down everything.

Become very mentally and emotionally flexible. See yourself as comfortable with contradictory personality qualities. Realize you can be strong and gentle, sensitive and tough, logical and intuitive, calm and emotional, serious and playful, and so forth. Practice ways to think in negative ways to reach positive outcomes.

Self-esteem is how you feel about yourself. It determines how much you learn after something goes wrong. Make a list of your positive traits and write them down. It allows you to receive praise and compliments. It acts as a buffer against hurtful statements while being receptive to constructive criticism.

It allows you to take risks without waiting for approval or reassurance from others. You expect to handle new situations well because of your past successes. Think of someone whom you know to be successful and project that person into yourself.

People who are in toxic working conditions are more stress resistant and are less likely to get sick when they have a loving family and maintain good friendships. Loners are more vulnerable to distressing conditions. Write letters to them or email. Talking with friends and family diminishes the impact of difficulties and increases feelings of self-worth and self-confidence.

Experience and express anger, love, dislike, appreciation, grief–the entire range of human emotions honestly and openly. Make the decision to choose to suppress the feelings when you believe it would be best to do so.

Nurture deep optimism guided by internal values and standards. Develop a high tolerance for ambiguity and uncertainty. Become a good role model of professionalism. Have a synergistic effect, brings stability to crises and chaos. Ask “How can I interact with this so that things turn out well for all of us?”

See things through the perspectives of others, even antagonists. Look for the win/win attitude in conflicts. Ask “What do others think and feel? What is it like to be them? How do they experience me? What is legitimate about what they feel, say, and do?”

Accept your gut feelings and intuition as being valid, useful sources of information. Ask “What is my body telling me? Did that daydream mean anything? Why don’t I believe what I’m being told? What if I did this?”

Avoid and block attacks, fight back. See through and side-step cons, “games,” and manipulations that others attempt. Find allies, resources, and support.

Converting misfortune into good luck and gaining strength from adversity is one of the learning lessons in the school of life. It is the antidote to feeling victimized. Convert a situation that is emotionally toxic for others into something emotionally nurturing. When you learn good lessons from bad experiences, it enables you to thrive in other distressing situations.

In order to enjoy your new life, realize that resiliency is not an end in itself. It is a continuing process to make you competent, resilient, durable, playful, and free. After a time, you will spend less time thinking about it, and you will survive major adver